Raped at the gas pump!!!

And I mean it, shoved straight in the butt, to the balls, no KY Jelly, no astrolide no NOTHING!!!!!!

Can you blame me for having a face like this?



Gas is $4.05 a gallon give or take a few pennies depending on where you go. I refuse to drive ANYWHERE I don't have to right now. I will walk everydamn where, heck it's exercise!!!

Erykah Badu @ Radio City Music Hall

Okay, so this past Friday (5/9/08) the fiance and I went to see non other than Miz Badu!!! Man oh man words cannot describe how I love this woman. My man told me that she gives you a great show, but nothing prepared me for it.

She sang a bunch of songs off of her new album Amerykah, but she didn't sing Honey!!!! That left me feeling cheated, as cheated as a hooker who got paid but the dude took back his money after he got the pannies. Yes, it was that deep.

Speaking of pannies, Loleatta Brown (if you don't know better ask somebody) she did "Annie don't wear no panties". LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWD if I didn't holler!!! Erykah is crazier than a little bit but damn if she doesn't tell the truth.

Oh, here's the video for ya:



NOW.....here's my only beef about the concert.

1. I hate everyone. I really do. Okay, almost everyone. I paid damn near $200 for tickets only to have the retarded ass people of the world walking back and forth...and back and forth...and back and forth!!!! I mean damn!!! I came to see Erykah and The Roots, not a bunch of stupid heads floating around blocking my view of the stage!!

2. The STUPID BROADS SITTING IN FRONT OF US RECORDING EVERY DAMN THING, JUMPING UP FOR EVERY DAMN SONG, AND FARTING CONTINUOUSLY!!!!!!!! They must have been tourists, cause they smelled like dirty water hotdogs and then kept blowing up the our seating section. Needless to say, EVERYONE that was near us was complaining. And between them standing up, I told the girl next to me she was a Godly girl, cause I would have been cussing up a storm. I offered her a twizzler to throw at the girls, or at least smack them in the back of the head with it if they kept standing up. My fiance was trying to hold back from taking her camera and chucking it down the aisle.

3. The drunk dude behind us screaming "WEPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!" every five seconds. Dude...I know you love Erykah, we do too. Which is why I paid to hear "Honey yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! You so sweet!!" not "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!" Keep that sh*t at your Daddy Yankee concert, ya dig?

4. THE EXPENSIVE @$$ PARKING FEE!!!!!!!!!!!! $51.00 USD, and the man must have thought he was gonna get a tip, even though our car was RIGHT THERE where we could have pulled out ourselves easily (which we did dammit)

5. Me not being able to get a picture of Erykah! I swear on everything I love, we are getting seats so close next time she comes to NY, I'm gonna be able to see the twinkle in her hazel eyes, and feel her SWEAT drop onto my forehead. I AIN'T LYING!!!!!

Highlights of the show:

1. The usher who was white bread but bopping along, dancing and two-stepping down the aisle. He knows good music!!

2. The drunken woman who...heheeeeee! Let me not talk too bad about folks, but LAWD sister was having herself a good ole time, cause she went to the bar at least 8 times and came back drunker....and drunker....and drunker. Now she had this gait that nearly made me hysterical with laughter. Now mix in a bunch of drinks, she sashayedsashayedsayshayed, almost fell over, stopped sashaying, caught herself, didn't spill her drinks and continued to sashaysashaysashay down the aisle. HEEEEEEEELARIOUS!!!!!!!!

3. The man proposing to his lady onstage. That was sweet! And Erykah gave them church hugs heheee!

4. The Roots wearing "We Are Sean Bell" shirts, and dedicating a song to him and his family. I thought that was nice of them.

5. Erykah's little dance to "Annie don't wear no panties." IT WAS HEEEEEEEEELARIOUS!!!! It was something you had to see, that's the best I can describe it.

6. Erykah coming out onto the seating area and letting other people sing. One girl was off key so Erykah had the band change it for her so she could sing lol. I can't remember what song, oh, it was "Tyrone". OH MAN I wish she would have come by me, I would have embarrassed myself just to be near her lol.

All in all, a great time was had. Can't wait till she comes back next year!!

Another tag game!!

So the lovely Nywele tagged me again, for six random quirky facts about myself!

1. I'm a chocolate whore. I've been known to drag my fiance to Teuscher which is wayyy in the city, buy $20 of truffles for us both, which we immediately devoured upon receiving, and then convinced him to walk back to the shop to get ANOTHER $20 worth of truffles, which we ate a tad more slowly then lol.

2. I write. No one sees it, but I do.

3. I loooooooove house music!!!

4. I live in Queens and hear owls. Don't let them tell you that owls don't reside in Queens, I beg to differ.

5. I'm a sucker for 80's movies. If Molly Ringwald is in it, most likely I have it.

6. Sometimes the most fun I have is doing nothing at all.

Ode to the Cosi salads....

Okay, so when my friend Lesley told me about Cosi, where she would buy freaking $9.00 SALADS, I thought she was MAD!!!! Until I went on the website and saw the edible love of my life, the wild alaskan salmon salad. That was enough for me to grab my fiance and drive out to west bubble gum, over the hills and through the mountains on great neck road to find our cosi.

After debating on us buying one salad nicoise and the wild alaskan one, (we would split it to see which we liked).....OMG!!!!!!!!!! The flavors! The medley! The presentation! THE WHEAT FLATBREAD!!!!! The mojito lemonade was good too but that salad!! We went Saturday and it's Monday morning and I'm already plotting on how to go back to cosi.

Go get yours. getcosi.com

A tag game!!

Nywele tagged me!

Things I'm passionate about:

God
Doing the right thing
Returning something that someone lent to you, in the same condition!
Being true to your word
Not borrowing money that I can't pay back




Things I'd like to do before I die:

Travel immensely
Owe no debt
Have my own house...and a vacation house wouldn't hurt

Things I say often:
"JU DUPID!!!!!"
"My tummy hurts."


Books I've read recently:

Queens Noir, forgot the author.
The Shadow of the Black Panther


Songs I could listen to over and over:

OMG loaded question,

"Fallen" by Mya
"Falling" by Gaelle (haha I just noticed both of the songs have almost the same title!)
"Still a dancer" by Kemdi
"The cure and the cause" by Fish Go Deep
ANYTHING by Osunlade




Traits I'm attracted to in my friends:

Loyalty
Honesty
Ride or die chicks!!!!
Humor, I can't stand people who are too serious
Intelligence, I don't want no dumb broads hanging around me
Class, spelled with a C, not a K

Signs that you might be a PJ (product junkie for the newbies)

Dammit, I know I'm not the only one. Here are just a few signs:

You have no fewer than 2 boxes at a time littering your room from stuff you've ordered online or from a swap/sell on a hair site.

You've ever swapped or bought hair goodies from another nappy and it came in a box where you can still see the qhemet/oyin/naturally curly label.

You send stuff to other nappies in boxes that you've received from qhemet/oyin/naturally curly.

You just CAN'T resist the sale (insert name here) is having although you already have 3 of their (insert product here)

You clear out a space on your shoe rack that your fiance built for you for SHOES. And it's stacked precariously with hair stuff, and heaven forbid anyone else but you touches it, everything will come tumbling down like humpty dumpty.

Payday isn't here yet, and you start rationalizing about what you can hold off paying for so you can get that "hit" of oyin/qhemet/karen's.

You've ever had packages delivered to your job so mom/spouse doesn't get it at home and go "MORE HAIR STUFF?!?!"

You beg a friend to bring your Anita Grant with her when she leaves London to come to NY. Because you don't have to pay extra shipping charges, you use the money you would have spent to get more goodies.

You sign up to almost every hair board you can think of to read product reviews from others.

You don't like to throw away empty containers once you've finished something, even though you have two more full containers of product stashed somewhere.

You stalk/add contents to your cart and save for future purchases/ on websites even though you know good and well you aren't planning on ordering anything anytime soon cause well, you have a ton of their stuff in your house already.

Someone can blindfold you, spin you around, push you south and push an open container of product under your nose and you can catch a whiff and know what you are smelling in 5 seconds or less.

The owners of the products are beginning to know you by name.

You threaten anyone who tries to borrow/steal from your hair stash.

You try to show your fiance a picture of your hair in your fotki, and he cruises over to the hair portion that you've been hiding from him and he sees it, let's out a string of words you can't repeat, keeps saying "OMG!!!!" over and over again, and threatens to sue for loss of income lolol. True story!!!!

Certain nappies on nappturality AND fotki talk about you, and call you a "pusher" (Yes, Afroknots, Redecouverte, Mikosbelle, Micheli07 and Jas.1984 I'M TALKING ABOUT YALL!!!!)

Added 4/4/08 ~ IF YOU FELL FOR THE BEST EVER APRIL FOOLS DAY JOKE, BROUGHT TO YOU BY NONE OTHER THAN THE EMPRESSRI!!!!

http://www.nappturality.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=115982&st=0

What the hell????

So in lieu of a sinus infection, flu, cold WHATEVER the hell I have (I blame a certain person who shall remain nameless. That is the last f**king time I play janitor, cause last time I checked that wasn't in my job description) I didn't go to work today. However, I did have to go to Whole Foods.

Now onto that. Dammit, why is it whenever I start liking something, time for me to stock up I can't find it again?!?! They had every other variety of the zbar that you could hope for but the damn one that I wanted. I'm telling you, it's a conspiracy, I don't care what anyone says. So anywho, after my fiance and I went to the one way out in East Bubblef**k, only to find out they didn't have my energy bars, we trekked to the other Whole Foods in Southeast Bubblef**k....ONLY to find out that they were out of stock as well!!!!!!! It's like the whole damn world is laughing at me. My attempt to stay healthy and quit eating junk food and this is what happens.

But that is not the point of this blog. As my fiance gets out of the car, he calls me over and says, "You gotta be kidding me. Whole Foods is going to hell!!"

Chile, I went over to the other side of the car and saw not one but TWO used pregnancy test on the ground!!! Think the user was anxious much? And you know my sick self had to kick it over to see whether it was positive or negative. They were negative, and I couldn't help but laughing thinking of the woman as she scrambled to pee on the sticks in her car, anxiously waiting to see how the events of her life were going to be turned around. I could SEE the look on her face..."THANK GOD!!!!!!!" lolol!!!

Don't believe me??

Test #1:



Test #2:



Now I've seen many used things on the ground in my life, pacifiers, condoms (ick!) but two pregnancy tests? Oh the humor. All I know is, I'm not going back to that Whole Foods.


Unless they get my damn zbars. It's worth stepping over 5 of them joints just to get those bars.